I was close to Mom growing up. She was a gentle and loving woman. Throughout her married life she struggled not only with diabetes, but the added burden of my father's depression. No less, she incurred also the work of supporting three growing boys. 
          Due to many years overflowing with unanswered prayers, I thought the event of her passing the worst thing in the world. However, several weeks before she passed away something extraordinary happened. Late one evening, I shuffled through my nightstand drawer in search for the rosary beads. Rarely did I pray them. However, by this point my prayers were completely empty. I felt as though I were in a “Twilight Zone”. With no words or petitions left in my heart, I simply began to recite the prayers with a small glimmer of hope for my mother’s life.
          Softly glowing upon my nightstand, the statue of the Good Shepherd Jesus offered its comforting presence. Nevertheless, while approaching the edge of despair, I could not have imagined what was about to happen. Within the dark shadows of my soul each prayer flickered with the spark of hope that I might be heard when to my astonishment the Shepherd’s voice filled the inner void. Unlike thunderous booming coming out from behind the clouds as I once imagined, his words welled up as a gentle whispering from within, “See how I carry this lamb. This is how I will carry you.” In awe, I swayed off the bed and began to peek about the house. I knew I wouldn’t find anything, I just did not know how else to respond. The Christ had spoken! I did not see him, but the sound of his gentle voice was as real as the bed on which I lay. I didn't know the meaning of his words, but I was certain that he had spoken. That night, my world was turned upside down. I saw all things from a softer lens. Each night there-after, I silently waited in hope that he would come again.
          Due to her diabetes and emerging heart complications on December 30, 1986, mom passed away.  Only then did I understand the Shepherd’s words. When she died I knew something holy had happened and that she was with him and happier than ever before. Indeed, the Shepherd carried me over the heartache of loss and into higher realms of heaven's truth. I came to complete understanding that our prayers are answered, although not necessarily in the way we might expect. Clearly, God had shown me that her passing was meant to be; and above all else it was okay. Indeed, I experienced sorrow. However, I was assured of her new life and homecoming.
          Completely moved by the enormity of God’s love, shortly afterward I said “yes” to the Father and entered Seminary College. With each passing day I grew more assured of the Father’s gentle approach. His way is one way; it is love’s way. By June of 1995, I was ordained a Catholic priest. However, as I experienced parish ministry something didn’t feel right; something was wrong. Often I denied it, but I could not run away from it.